FFC 5-2 NUFC: Your #5WordReviews

After Saturday’s capitulation at the Cottage, here are your #5WordReviews:

@johnnylilley Winning till Gaz turned up (Yep - sorry!)
@Ludachris14: A game of two halves
@JamJarWilkie: It’s time for fooking beer
@blufescu74: Dempsey demolishes dire defending demonstration!
@CHNOSotP: Three points forfeited. Moving on.
@WeAreTheMags: There’s only one Eff-in Fulham
@NufcKev: What the FUCK happened, lads?!
@DaveBrennan: High defensive line fuck up
@McQue88: Did that really just happen?
@Cooperi4: Where the fuck’s our defence?
@DaveByrne1980: What happened at half time?

…and one which wasn’t even a 5WordReview but sod it, I’m putting it on anyway:

@AndyMarkSimpson: It’s National Pie Day today! 

NUFC 2-1 BRFC: Your #5WordReviews

Here are your #5WordReviews for Saturday’s 2-1 win over Blackburn:

@tomlowson: HBA with Ba mint potential
@Grappa_King: Shite match 2 great goals
@krisbainy: Lay off Obertan kernts
@themanmellow: Who’s been drinking my syrup?
@Zadeh7: He’s here, there, everywhere…SPIDERMAN!
@Jobey07: Finally he’s up and Hatem
@Ludachris14: Shola, Shola, Shola, Shola, Shola
@tomnufc: Blackburn chicken out after goal
@iamgeordie: Don’t Boo Newcastle United Players!
@graeme_ncl: We’ve a star in Santon
@CHNOSotP: Thank god no Rovers replay
@halliday_9: Benny must play right wing
@michael9nufc: The return of the mask
@martin__wilson: Demba gone, Hatem skins em’

Thanks for your entries - any you wanna add..comments below! 

#5WordReview Special - Andy Carroll joins Liverpool

Last night, we asked you to give us your #5WordReviews of Carroll’s move to Liverpool. Here are some of the best:

@tomnufc: Ashley does right for once
@josh1892: Judas scummy prick good riddance
@Ryan_Adams93: Unhappy but offer was unrefusable
@torontoonarmy: Weld your hubcaps on mate
@KJDellow: All about the money, kernt 
@its_mal_ross: A great piece of business
@DarrelBirkett: Silly money, will we spend?
@JoshuaHeppell: Forced out by Fat Ash
@BianchiRoadyIOW: Could have been a legend
@therealrobbo: Every man has his price
@NufcKev: Sad f*cking judas mackem b*stard!
@sniperinthemidst: Carroll wishes he was Shola
@Gazcumps: You’ll never be a Shearer
@BadgeMonkey (a scouser!): What the f*ck just happened?!
@nendsuperzmaj: Next Shearer became next Owen

And a personal favourite:
@m1cvv: Outside SJP? You’re a kernt…

We then asked for them again tonight, following the further news…:

@tomnufc: Money talks, no.9 means nothing
@ChrisKenobi: Lots of press spin again
@graeme_ncl: Stitched up like a kipper
@darrenprembet: Leon Best better be mint / At least it wasn’t Coloccini
@doobydadoo: He will never go…oh
@MarcSDuffy: They can ALL f*ck off

We love hearing your opinions as always…send owt you like to www.twitter.com/shiteseats or info@shiteseats.co.uk

SAFC 1-1 NUFC: Your Twitter #5WordReviews

Afternoon, sorry for the delay in the usual guff from ourselves! 

After Sundays emphatic 1-1 win by 5under1and (hahahahahah) here’s your Twitter #5WordReviews:

terenceleonard - you’ll never beat the magpies!!!
stodge87 - played SMB’s off park - ROBBED
blufescu - Steve Bruce, What’s the song?
whitworthian - sunderland open dead mans chest
danegan1981 - fucking dirty jammy little bottlers
therealrobbo - lucky lucky lucky lucky Sunderland
nobbysdog - lucky equaliser doesn’t hide truth
chrisb7575 - love to smash you up w@nker. FTM (not 5 words but cheers anyhow, #kernt)
Luda14 - Sunderlands a Shit Hole Iwannagohome (we’ll let you off with this one mate.)
WeAreTheMags - Mackems Rip Out Shite Seats (love it!)
jboy1892 - fat man runs for pies
marcsduffy - Terrific Toon Terrorise Terrible Tramps
hayrr - Robbed by Gyan’s Left Bollock
mattcharlt0n - Kevin Nolan backheeled it in!
kjdellow - Bent still in Collo’s pocket
anthony_nufc - Fuck off back to pennywell

NUFC 1-3 MCFC & THFC 2-0 NUFC: A Twitter #5WordReview double-header

Here are your #5WordReviews for the festive double header defeats at home to Citeh and away to Spuds…

NUFC 1-3 MCFC:

@0UT0FT00N: five minutes was too much
@ToonArmyMIA: Pardew’s honeymoon is officially over
@oitappin: high work rate low reward
@de_facto_phil: Effort doesn’t get us points
@redskymornings: Five minutes of self ruin
@blefuscu74: Manc Mackems handed Christmas gift
@ToonArmyMIA: Boxing Day is bollocks again
@katdave: bad start, got better. Rubbish.
@pjwhitfield: Nothing different to Hughton’s team
@graeme_ncl: Schoolboy errors but promising signs
@WeAreTheMags: What was number one piedea? (Gaz: alright, alright!)
@Luda14: First five minutes killed us
@Hayrr: Why wasn’t de Jong crippled?
@paulmarsdenNUFC: Kicking ourself in the ballbag
@dcb72: Man City - funded by Al Qaeda
@Nettydoor: Cold, Cold, cold, cold, cold

THFC 2-0 NUFC:

@thisgroupoflads: we are worse with 10men
@ajwacker62: Wigan now a relegation decider
@WeAreTheMags: Spuds beat duds two nil

Looks like the post-Christmas apathy kicked in for the Spurs game - not to worry, we’ll be back in 2011 with more #5WordReviews…!