The Seats - Fiercely Independent Since 2008

Download The Site Sheets....NUFC 2012

Wed, 15 Feb 2012 07:11:07 +0000

Get downloading our 2012 compilation so far - 50+ pages of NUFC related guff - in glorious technicolour (pdf format - 7Mb), perfect for that spare 2 mins with your kindles, iPads or god forbid laptops!

LINK HERE

Prospective writers who have emailed in, we will be in touch soon for Volume.2!

Football writers....needed.

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 18:00:52 +0000

As you may have seen on our twitter feed, we are looking for writers….this is the reason why….

Once every few month, we aim to release a PDF document as a retrospective of everything that has been going on at Seats HQ….this document will contain all the postings, pictures, 5 word reviews..basically everything that is on the site (in glorious technicolour), we have batted this idea around for a while and we aim to give those that perhaps dont visit us reguarly get an opportunity to read all the posts in digi format, means that wanke…I mean people with iPads and Kindles etc.. can enjoy the gashness of the seats to their hearts content…It will also have links to our podcasts and anything else that takes our fancy.

This is where the guest writers come in, we would like some articles that are written by fans of the seats to appear in this bi-monthly publication, we are not sure yet as to how this will work, the style of the work or indeed the content….but we can work on that as we move forward as the original volume is nearly completed and is due out in March 2012…then we will give our writers relatively free-reign to write about football matters close to their hearts, prefferably North East football related.

We know by our visitor figures that this publication could be seen by thousands every month, so it is a good opportunity for some of our great followers to get some exposure, as long as they dont mind being ‘spotted’ hanging out with the likes of us….you all know the drill by now.

So if you are interested, please let us know…we would love to hear from you. Email us at info@shiteseats.co.uk and we promise to be in touch as soon as we have plans afoot. Ideally we would like 20-30 writers to appear in our bi-monthly publication.

Cheers

The CAF 2012 final - penalty shoot out.

Mon, 13 Feb 2012 11:55:11 +0000

The CAF 2012 final - penalty shoot out.

Zambia do it...

Mon, 13 Feb 2012 11:53:00 +0000

So the African Cup of Nations is now over, the favourites the star studded Ivory Coast team fall short at the last to a spirited Zambia side, who had ghosts of the past to exorcise in the Gabonese capital of Libreville.

All thoughts pre-match were with the Zambian team of 1993 who were tragically killed when a military aircraft carrying the national squad plunged into the Atlantic Ocean killing all 30 players, officials and crew on board.

The match goalless at 120 minutes went to a nail biting penalty shoot out, which itself went to sudden death, with Zambia running out 8-7 winners.

Coach Herve Renard and the Zambian team will no doubt get a heros welcome in Lusaka when they return later today.

Well done Zambia and commiserations to Cheik Tiote and the Ivory Coast.

Lusaka goes mad!

THFC 5-0 NUFC

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 20:03:10 +0000

It truly was Shite Hart Lane for Pardew’s Mags last night as the patched-up midfield surrendered meekly in front of a rampant Spurs to remind Harry Redknapp just what he’ll be leaving behind should he take on the world’s biggest football job at England.

Pardew tried to go attacking, with a 4-4-2 allowing the Dembii to start together for the first time, but all of the pre-game plans were blown away in the first 6 minutes, as Assou-Ekotto and, surprise surprise, Louis Saha both grabbed goals to give Spurs a blistering start.

United had a fair chunk of possession but were creating nothing and, in the words of Chrissy Waddle, ‘sow sloppee’ on the ball, and were consistently punished, as Saha grabbed his second and Spurs’ third on 20 minutes, and Kranjcar made it four on the half-hour.

The central midfield of Perch and Guthrie, who had played so admirably last week against Villa, were blown apart by Parker and Modric, and Williamson and Simpson were also hugely under par and found Saha and especially Adebayor far to hot to handle on a freezing night in North London.

Pardew threw Ferguson on for the ineffective Obertan at half-time, but to no avail, and Spurs grabbed their fifth just after the hour mark, Adebayor grabbing a deserved goal to go with his four assists for his evening’s work.

United saw out the last half hour with no further shipped, but it was a night to forget on and off the pitch, as the Spurs’ fans and media fawning of Harry Redknapp rose to vomit-inducing levels. On the bench, Hatem Ben Arfa yet again field to appear, and concerns must be rising as to whether a future lies ahead for the enigmatic Frenchman on Tyneside.

The travelling Mags were, however, yet again utterly magnificent in the face of a drubbing on he field, backing their lads until the 90th minute and beyond, and, despite the hammering, we remain in sixth place and only a point from the Champions League places, and need to bounce back in a fortnight’s time at home to Wolves.

Spuds (a) - 11th Feb 2012...

Fri, 10 Feb 2012 17:02:34 +0000

Match Preview & Predictions - Spurs (A) - Premier League - 11/02/2012 - Live on ESPN - 17:30

Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:20:26 +0000

This weekend’s game see’s us play tax dodger supremo and future England manager Harry Redknapp’s Spurs.

Spurs are currently the second most in-form team in the league, along with that shower of shite down the road in terms of results.

Unlike their game on Monday night against Racistpool, Spurs are thought to a few of their absentee’s back, whilst we are still without Tiote (ACON) and Cabaye (suspended), as well as the rest of the players out for the remainder of the season.

Our Thoughts:

@therealrobbo – Again the curse of the late KO, with Man Utd playing Liverpool in the early KO at Old Trafford any result by United will no doubt spur on an already flying Tottenham side.

We rarely get anything at WHL and I can see this going with form unfortunately, just given the timing and the fact that there droopy faced manager is off the back of a high, I can see Spurs really pulling together and the fact they have a near full squad to choose from this will be tough.

However we have some fight and I would expect that we can score and I think the game may not be a walk over for Spurs, but I hate to say it but I expect the defeat come 8pm Saturday.

Prediction: 3-1 or 2-1 Spurs

@rammlet – Can’t see us getting anything at Sh*te Hart Lane – with the players we have missing (still) and the form Spurs are in it will be extremely difficult, but maybe the Redknapp situation might just be a distraction for the Cockernees

Prediction: I still expect them to turn us over though, and I’m going for a 2-0 home win.

@mattypnufc – Pissy fucking shitty bollocks! Shit time to play these cunts if there ever was one and especially when Newcastle are without our best central pairing.

Can’t see us getting anything whatsoever, with their performance at Klannfield earlier this week fresh in my memory, it gives me a slight glimmer of hope that if we have a good day and a bit of luck we might nick something. Fucking Spurs man. Toss.

Prediction: Lose 3-1

Shola is a little sad this week as he reckons we’ll get beat too. Poor Shola.

Mackem Boom/Bust Cycle - February 2012

Wed, 08 Feb 2012 12:12:08 +0000

The boom/bust cycle remains very much in full swing, and as you can probably already tell, we’re heading (if not already there) into the very height of the cycle, where optimism regarding the derby will be coming to a crescendo in the next month.

What you will see and hear:

‘Better squad on paper’
‘Your bubble is bursting’
‘Played no-one’
‘Put your money where your mouth is’
‘We’ll see in the derby’

and of course, the customary

‘9-1 9-1 2-1 2-1 ROFL LMAO FTM’

Remain your usual, calm and collected self during this time. Do not approach any stray Mackems in the street as they may be venomous. Remember, this will all disappear post-derby, and we will then be in the longest stretch of the cycle where the derby defeat will be painful, their best players will leave and the manager’s reputation will decrease and decrease.

This was yet another public service broadcast by the boys at ShiteSeats.

And remember…don’t have nightmares.

Would you like to sponsor the Seats...

Wed, 08 Feb 2012 11:54:39 +0000

We are looking after a Sponsor to help us cover the costs of our podcast hosting and advertising.

Here’s what we are after…
£25 per month from a company, preferably local (Tyneside) and preferably with something in common, football, beer, pies etc…

This will get you in return a logo / advertisement on our front page the months paid for, it will also get you a mention on our monthly podcast.

Any business cards purchased will also have your business card logo (or) name on.

What this will pay for is….any advertisement costs and our podcast hosting and file hosting.

Any monies we do not spend will be given back to the sponsor or given to a local charity. (the choice of the sponsor) and a balance book will be given back to said sponsor.

Here are the stats…….

Since birth the seats have had the following visitors
457,337    Visits
621,282    Page Views
201,493    Unique Visits
of which
43.73    are New
56.27    are Returning
they come from
177    Countries
5118    Cities

These are the monthly averages for the site
11,155    Visits
15,153    Page Views
4,914    Unique Visits

and we are currently getting approximately 800 downloads of our podcast, which we hope will grow with further episodes.

If you would like to sponsor the seats, please send us an email - info@shiteseats.co.uk with the following information……

Name:
Business Name:
Interested in 1/3/6/12 month sponsorship?:
Email:
Telephone:

Thanks

The Lads

Mad Danes record a tribute rock song to the Toon.

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 22:11:13 +0000

Mad Danes record a tribute rock song to the Toon.

Safe Standing Anyone...

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:41:40 +0000

The Safe-Standing campaign was discussed at the NUFC Fans meeting last night.

The site in question is here - http://www.safestandingroadshow.co.uk/home

It’s a great site with all the details about rail seating and how it relates to current legislation.

Thanks to Andrew M.S. for this (via Z)

A Picture of Shola Ameobi in a tractor

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:31:47 +0000

…while his brother smiles from below alongside some dude balancing a grey slug on his lip and a mini Peter Ramage.

Some things don’t need any further explanation.

North East Football Writers' Association Awards...

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:30:52 +0000

On Sunday night, the region’s football community came together to celebrate the very best of the 2010/2011 football season and to raise funds for the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation.

Sponsored by Barclays, the 2011 North East Football Writers’ Association awards dinner at Ramside Hall in Durham is a regular highlight in the region’s football calendar and this year was no exception.

The event was attended by players, managers, directors and officials from all of the north east football clubs including Alan Pardew and Tony Mowbray. It was also supported by Newcastle United legend Alan Shearer, who is a Patron of the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation.

Hosted by BBC Radio 5 Lives’ Ian Dennis, entertainment was provided by popular local comedian Josh Daniels who faced stiff competition on the laughs front from Carlisle United manager Greg Abbott.

Middlesbrough’s Joe Bennett was named Young Player of the Year and there were special awards for Whitley Bay FC, Carlisle United, Hartlepool’s Ritchie Humphreys and Darlington manager Craig Liddle.

Newcastle United captain Fabricio Coloccini was crowned Player of the Year, and said: “I was very pleased to receive the award, following in the footsteps of such Newcastle greats as Peter Beardsley, Alan Shearer and Shay Given.

“I would like to thank everyone who voted for me, it really was a great honour for me.

“Coming on the back of a good win for us against Aston Villa, it made for a tremendous day for me, and I want to share this with my family, teammates, everyone at the Club and the fans.”

The event was originally due to be held on 27th November and was postponed following the sudden death of former Newcastle United and Wales footballer Gary Speed. Warm tributes were paid to Gary and also to Sunderland Echo journalist Ian Laws who died recently aged just 41.

This is the third year the North East Football Writers’ Association has supported the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation and this year, for the first time, the Association and the charity jointly made an award to honour one of the region’s most respected football professionals.

The inaugural North East Football Writers’ Association’s Personality of the Year, in association with the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation, was awarded to Sunderland AFC’s Niall Quinn in recognition of his five years as the club’s chairman and his wider contribution to the local community.

Niall was unable to attend and sent an appreciative video message, while the award was collected on his behalf by Sunderland’s 1973 FA Cup hero Jimmy Montgomery.

Colin Young, representing the North East Football Writers’ Association, said: “We’re really proud of our association with the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation. Not only was Sir Bobby a great communicator, he was a man held in esteem by the whole of our region and beyond and that’s the essence of our dinner - that local rivalry gets put to one side as we celebrate the best of each other and ourselves.

“The fact that the Foundation is raising money which directly helps cancer patients from across the whole of the North East and Cumbria is another reason why the partnership is a perfect fit.

“We’re honoured that Lady Elsie and her family agreed to support our Personality of the Year award and hope that we’ve established a new tradition in keeping with what’s always a great night.”

Since Sir Bobby and Lady Elsie launched the charity in 2008, the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation has raised over £3.9 million to help find more effective treatments for cancer.

It funds projects within the Newcastle upon Tyne Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust, which directly benefit cancer patients from across the north east and Cumbria, including the clinical trials of drugs at the Sir Bobby Robson Cancer Trials Research Centre.

To make a donation, view messages of support, or for more information please visit www.sirbobbyrobsonfoundation.org.uk or donate by sending a cheque to Sir Bobby Robson Foundation, Room 203, Cheviot Court, Freeman Hospital, Newcastle upon Tyne NE7 7DN.

Issued on behalf of The Sir Bobby Robson Foundation (registered charity No: 1057213) by Longstone Public Relations.

Thanks Liz.

New Zealand Magpies...Get in Touch!

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:52:00 +0000

All we have been in contact witha fellow magpie from 11,000 miles away in New Zealand by the name of @MagFansNZ - who has recently joined twitter to look and to engage for Magpies in New Zealand and across the world.

A bit of background on NZMag, a Newcastle fan currently exiled in Auckland (for last 15 years), New Zealand. Not actually a Geordie lad though, as he was born in Hartlepool. ‘Cue monkey jokes’.

He found himself tweeting from a personal account about football (mainly toon-related, of course), to little to no audience. He then discovered the True Faith and Football Ramble podcasts, and was left sort of feeling a little left out on Newcastle discussions. Especially given the fact that because of time zones, whenever I’m online, you lot are all in bed. “Cry me a river (Tyne)”, right?

Anyway, he thought it might be worth starting a new twitter account to try and gather like minded Newcastle fans from New Zealand for some low-brow football related banter. It’s become more of an “exiled Newcastle fans” page now though, which is probably for the better. It’s just me that runs it at this point, but when he hits 1,000,000 followers, he might get someone to help me out…

It would be great if like-minded Newcastle or English footy fans based in the pacific and especially NZ got in touch and followed this lad, who knows maybe this could lead to the birth of another (not enough in my opinion) Fans group..who can enjoy each others company and craic, whilst enjoying the rollercoaster that is supporting NUFC.

Get following and spread the good word.

Mark Lawrenson - The Greatest Tipster Ever...

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 11:53:45 +0000

Mark Lawrenson - The Greatest Tipster Ever...:

Click on the link to see Lawrensons outstanding predictions this season.

Thanks Pete D for the link.

Touché...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 20:38:00 +0000

NUFC 2-1 AVFC: Your #5WordReviews

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 20:32:37 +0000

There were, to put it mathematically, a fuckton of #5WordReviews sent to us yesterday and today. Here are our favourites:

@lovetheturret: Double Dembas doesn’t disappoint…like
@David_Mullan: Ciss9 gets lost in warmup!
@Doddsy9: I love the Double Dembas
@howay51: Dembas went in two by two (that’s 6 but who cares?)
@AndrewBThompson: Perch is Busquets in disguise
@SamBaldwin19: Papiss poaches Pardew’s precious points
@Hayrr: The Dembas take the Papiss
@Bromptonite: Let’s not forget Tim Krul
@ToonTeg: Deadly Double Dembas Vanquish Villans
@MontyMag: Weak refereeing yields unnecessary injuries
@billyjoelismint: Never mind Cissé, Perchy’s mint
@blefuscu74: Let’s all laugh at Villa
@IainReynolds: Demba Demba sink the Sulker
@sytuck1977: The Demba Boys are coming!
@LeeSibbald: So where’s your messiah now?
@teeweeM: Newcastle are still riding luck
@Bully5HVFC: Laugh last, laugh the longest

And our favourite, for the sheer brilliance of the wordplay, the pun and the clever use of limited words goes to:

@Rob_Hardie85: Newcastle won against Aston Villa

Wor Dembii!

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 13:19:18 +0000

Wor Dembii!

The Dembii… Thanks to our mate Diane for this one.

Sun, 05 Feb 2012 20:22:26 +0000

The Dembii…

Thanks to our mate Diane for this one.

NUFC 2-1 AVFC

Sun, 05 Feb 2012 20:15:14 +0000

A wonderful debut strike from Papiss Demba Cissé gave Pardew’s Mags another crucial home three points to keep the charge for - don’t snigger - the Champions League places on track.

Pardew shuffled his pack again, this time starting with a midfield of Raylor, Guthrie, Perch and Jonas in a four-man midfield, with Leon Best partnering the returning Demba Ba up front, only for him to lose Best early on, giving the opportunity for Demba II to make his debut.

And it was the original Demba who gave the lads the lead on the half-hour, when he swept home following a blocked Ryan Taylor effort on his return from the African Cup of Nations. Raylor was badly injured in the process - inadvertently it seems from a Stephen Warnock block - and was carried from the field with his leg in a splint, though Pardew has since said that the injury was not as bad as first feared.

United were struggling at the back though, with N’Zogbia and Bent both causing problems for the back four, and after various close-shaves, Robbie Keane finally equalised in the fourth minute of first-half injury time after he touched home from close range following an N’Zogbia cross.

Villa again had their chances in the second half, but the Mags did also, with Cissé guilty of a very poor miss from 6 yards from a Guthrie cross, before he popped up with a goal of stunning quality to give our boys all three points.

Jonas swung in a beautiful ball from out left, which found it’s way to Cissé, who controlled and stuck a stunning left-foot strike high into Shay Given’s net to the delirium of another packed SJP.

United found themselves hanging on in the later stages, but came away with another great three points, and credit must go to James Perch for another tidy performance in the centre of midfield.

Chelsea went one point clear again with their 3-3 draw with Man Utd later on, but we continue to surprise, frustrate and impress in equal measures and remain 9 points clear of that eighth place and could - just could - find ourselves back in Europe.